Grief is..

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I wrote this piece as way to process the recent, sudden death of my father.  To say that this is a difficult time would be an understatement.  However, my family is strong and we are navigating this journey together. My hope is that these words will find their way to someone who needs them.
Grief is powerful.

It can darken the most beautiful days.

Grief can be ugly.

Taking the form of dark circles and bloodshot eyes.

 

Grief is physical.

It HURTS.

Grief is the pounding in your head and the pit in your stomach.

It can make the most mundane task seem impossible.

 

Grief is unpredictable.

It comes in waves throughout the days, weeks, and years.

Grief is a shapeshifter of emotions, masquerading as anger, hopelessness, and denial.

It rears its ugly head in the most unassuming places.
Grief is relentless

It surrounds us.

Grief’s presence can be felt everywhere and at any time.

It steals sleep and replaces it with endless stretches of what could have been.

 

Grief is necessary.

It is a process.

Grief is healing cloaked in sorrow.

It tests our strength and forces us on.

 

But somewhere there is light.

A light that shines on us and through us.

The source of which is our lost loved ones.

And we have to find the light, cling to the light, embrace the light.

 

Take the light.

Share it with others.

Shine it on those wandering in the darkness.

BE the light.

 

5 thoughts on “Grief is..

  1. Valerie Brang

    Megan,
    I’ve read most of your blog posts and this by far is the most beautiful!
    You are right on target with those waves of memories for our loved ones……it does hit you at any given moment! It is not easy but something everyone must learn to deal with at one time or another .
    I’m am so sorry for your loss! Know that you and your mom have been heavy on our minds and in our hearts these past few weeks!
    You were even part of our Thanksgiving blessing!
    Even though everyone’s life has gone back to normal and you are left dealing with this excruciating pain and emptiness we are all still thinking of you and praying for peace for you all in the coming months.
    Hold that precious little Eva a little closer….she will be a great source of comfort for you ❤️ Valerie

  2. Bonnie P

    Beautifully written and on point. In my experience it felt like it would never leave me and when it did for those few brief moments I felt guilty that I wasn’t grieving or sad. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. It is different for each and every one of us. I found the worst place for me was driving in my car. It would hit me like a ton of bricks and I would literally sob to the point that I would have to pull over to get myself together. You never get over the loss of a close loved one. They take a piece of your heart with you but at the same time, it is necessary and healthy to grieve because that is part of the healing process. My mom died on November 18, 1994 and my son died on April 26, 1998. My mom died on my son’s birthday. I still have moments of sadness, especially around the holidays. They are the hardest to deal with because for the most part we grew up with wonderful childhood memories with our parents and children. It will get better each day until one day you are able to talk about your loved one without crying and share a special memory without turning into a complete puddle of goo. All you can do is take baby steps and go through your personal grieving process as you see fit. God Bless you my beautiful “daughter” in-law and your family. Your dad was a wonderful man and will be missed by many.

  3. That was absolutely beautiful, Meg. You hit the nail on the head. They say that you grieve even in your sleep, but the other night I had the most beautiful dream of my mother playing with my son when he was a baby. The scene actually happened in real life, and it was like my mother replayed a happy memory, just for me. Knowing how much I worry about my Patrick, I think that she was trying to tell me that she is watching over him.

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